The people you surround yourself with, can make or break you. Some people can drain you, use you, or constantly put you down. Others can make you feel like you can never do anything right or can never be good enough, no matter how hard you try. You may find yourself in a constant battle, trying to please others, leaving you depleted and unhappy in the process. You do not have to tolerate this. You have a choice!
Toxic people are people who have a pattern of negatively impacting your life. It can be damaging and very unhealthy for your well-being. If someone handed you a spoonful of a poisonous liquid, you wouldn’t jump at the chance to drink it, would you? Yet we find ourselves more tolerant with poisonous people.
It is imperative that you protect yourself when it comes to people as well. You will have to make some difficult decisions, but in the end it will lead to a happier and more peaceful life. Removing these negative people, can make room for more positive and loving people.
Poisonous people can seep under your skin and leave you feeling sick and terrible inside. It can be extremely damaging to your self-worth. This may be a harsh reality, but often these toxic people are the ones closest to you. Because they are so close, you may find yourself being much more accepting and more likely to justify their negative behavior.
FAMILY: Parents, siblings or any family member can be extremely toxic. They are your family. They are supposed to unconditionally love you and support you. Many times family members can be the most damaging; especially when it is a parent.
FRIENDS: Friends can be draining. Some often suck you into their drama. You may feel obligated to listen to them and try and save them. You think you are helping them, but you really aren’t. You give them advice, but they never take it. Some can be selfish and you need to revolve your life around them. You are always there for them, but the one time you need them, they are nowhere to be found. Does this sound familiar?
CO-WORKERS: In most workplaces, you may come across at least one person that is always complaining and is negative. You come to work in a great mood, and within minutes of being around this person, you may feel a shift in the entire work atmosphere. This person may point out every little mistake you make and is the first to make it known. You know the type.
It is important to take some serious time to think about these people in your life. These are the people that are resulting in you having a good day or a bad day. These are the people who are the contributing in the majority of your stress or happiness. The choice is yours.
Love Yourself Enough to Let These Toxic People Go
Some toxic people will let you go with ease: As soon as you are no longer tolerating the way they treat you or have discovered their true colors, they dismiss you like everything you ever had together meant absolutely nothing. This can hurt. You have put in so much time and effort into loving, helping and supporting them and the relationship carries no weight? You point out their behavior and they hold no accountability. Instead they use this tactic and somehow turn things onto you. I have seen those games played, way too many times. When they realize that you have “figured” them out, they are gone…just like that! It doesn’t make sense, but let them go. They do not value the relationship as much as you do. You deserve better!
Some toxic people will make it difficult to let them go: These people have something to lose, by you moving forward without them. You offer them something that they do not want to give up. You are always there for them, but when you finally need them, they are nowhere to be found. Often this is a one sided relationship. Also, you moving on without them in pursuit of your happiness and well-being, may pose a threat to their insecurities.
Some toxic people you just can’t avoid in your life: Sometimes you just can’t get away from some of these toxic people. You want to remove them out of your life, but they are at your workplace, or keep showing up at a social gathering or family event. In these situations, it is important to set boundaries. You need to set your limits to what you are willing to accept or tolerate. If they cross the line, remove yourself and walk away. Find some happy, positive and loving person instead and talk to them.
In the end, it does not matter if it is a parent, sibling, best friend, co-worker or stranger. No one deserves to be taken for granted or mistreated. Do not tolerate or enable this behavior. Also, do not take it personally. Often those people are treating others the exact same way. You deserve and are worth more.
It is imperative that you protect yourself when it comes to toxic people. You will have to make some difficult decisions, but in the end it will lead to a happier and more peaceful life.
Take some time today and take care of yourself. Re-evaluate the people in your life. How do they make you feel? Do you feel better or worse after talking or seeing them? Let your feelings be your guide. Get rid of the ones who are negatively impacting your life. They are slowly and continually corroding your soul, self-esteem and self-worth. Make space and time for the loving and supportive people. You’re worth it!